Haven't been around much. I've been playing injured. On February 15, 2014, I went for a walk with a little "kink" in my back. By the end of the day, I was in pain. A lot of pain. The kind of pain that causes you to lose sleep and walk around the house looking for another place to sit and maybe catch a few minutes of sleep. After two days of perfecting my extreme limp; learning how to walk with a cane that was generously provided by the physical therapists at my job and still trying to find a way to sleep, I hauled my sorry self into the doctor and a diagnosis was made: Bulging disc. Degenerating disc. Not good.
Well, it's been six months since that proclamation and I've had big time steroids, MRI, physical therapy, some electrode shock thingies that made me feel like a frog in a biology class, a cortisone shot and regular appointments with a chiropractor. The good thing is that I met my insurance responsibility so it's all good now!
Added to this was an unexplained knee injury caused by just getting up and taking a step! That happened about 2 months ago.
Let me just say that I am so over all of this. I biked through the knee injury--my own rehab attempt. Just a little bit of discomfort now and then. The back is better--not totally healed--I still have to be aware of everything I do now so I don't do something REALLY stupid like I tend to do.
Nothing is the way it was.
Do I wish it was the way it was? Of course.
Did something good come from a few challenges? Ditto.
It's been six months of change and challenge. It's not just that something bad happened to me. It's what I learned from it. (How many more lessons do I have to learn?)
Is this the way I want to live the rest of my life? Is this the person I want to be?
I look at this six months of physical irritations as a wake up call. It's not too late to turn things around.....even a little bit.
When your plan -- keep living the very active life you were leading and then just drop dead -- is suddenly altered, a new plan takes shape. Obviously I'm not going to be found dead in my yard surrounded by 50 pound bags of something or other that I was hauling to the garden. Damn. That would be perfect.
Never did I think that I would look at people taking a simple walk and be envious. Well, it happened.
Compared to a life-threatening problem, this is nothing. But to me, it is everything. I've already slapped myself for whining.
For the first time in my memory, I had to ask for help.
Lots of changes. Some details to come.
This blog has been dormant for almost a year.
Now it's become my sounding board. A bit of mental therapy.
So what good things came from this and continue coming? I signed up for a yoga class and I got into biking in a big way. A really big way. I've been riding for decades but now it's my salvation. It doesn't hurt that I started a new "collection"--vintage Trek bikes. The biggest change has been that I decided to start living more in the moment vs. thinking I'll do this or that later on. When? Do it now.
Ranch Journal ~ February 19, 2018
19 minutes ago